Change...

Anticipating change can be a dangerous thing. A person can crave it knowing its coming, fear it being so close and welcome it when it arrives. These feelings are confusing and make us feel like we have no control.

Change is inevitable however sometimes it doesn't come fast enough.

It could be a stay at home mother, whose husband works out of town and the little ones are growing quickly and she's feeling stuck. She wants another baby but her husband doesn't, her age wont allow her or she's developed a disease that has made conceiving nearly impossible. She feels she has no right to complain about infertility with her two little ones in her arms yet feels the pain of the day to day, the routine, and the every lasting knowing that this is her life now. She knows what her friend is going through when she tells her that she's getting divorced but she cant say anything because her husband hasn't left her yet. She's waiting for the day he realizes she's a failure but hope that day never comes. She is overwhelmed with love for her babies but this life, this world, this pain isn't what she imagined. She's craving change but cant see it coming to greet her any time soon.

There's the single girl whose life is put together. She has an amazing career, a beautiful home, an amazing roommate and so many friends. She has built herself up from heartbreak and horror and has figured out who she is, what she wants and has been working and changing herself to be happy. She's been hurt so many times that she wants to find love, to find someone to share her future with, but she's scared. She's terrified to give it her all to get nothing in return. She's hoping for the change, the one to be her perfect match but she's terrified of it. She's so scared of change that it paralyzes her when she wants to move... she's urging her body and mind and heart to move... but her fear is paralyzing her to the ground in a stone like state... She's begging for the change but is over run by fear of it.

There's the young couple, who got married and started trying for a family right away... years went by and they tried everything they could... they craved that baby... they did treatments, drugs, vacations, and fell into a routine of falling in love, seeing the world, but craving that family. The time has finally come where they are in a state to get their dreams and they are ready, they are anxious, they cant sit still they're so excited... the change cant come fast enough. There are risks, there are doubts and there may be heart break but they can stand it!! They are so welcoming to this change that since its so close they feel their in a rut!! They are so used to going on vacation whenever they want and they are so close to their treatment that they cant wait but are itching to get away, itching for a change. Their days are dragging and their nights are restless. Their legs want travel and their hearts want that baby. They know their change is coming but cant wait for it to get here.

Change... its paralyzing, exciting, amazing and horrible. It can make your world or break it down. It can heal you, help you or slowly kill you.

Change.